“Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave the way open for God’s wrath, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:19).
On our journey of healing, one of the most challenging things God may ask of us is to forgive those who have hurt us. This has certainly been difficult for me, but what helped was realizing that hurting people often hurt others. When we focus solely on our pain, we may forget that those who hurt us might be struggling too.
I’ve seen this firsthand with people close to me. They’ve acted in ways that have caused me pain, but as I reflected on their lives, I recognized that their actions often stemmed from their own unresolved struggles. Many of us long for stability and love, yet life doesn’t always turn out as we hope.
For example, I know someone who entered relationships seeking stability but ended up facing heartbreak and disappointment. These experiences can lead to a cycle of pain where hurt people unintentionally hurt others. It’s easy to overlook how our choices can stray from God’s principles and lead to deeper pain.
In our household, we strive to live by God’s way. I no longer care about the opinions of others as long as we are following a godly path.
The truth is, hurt people hurt people. This was evident in a story I heard about a woman who was abused by her father. When she confided in her mother, her mother didn’t believe her and stood by her father. Years later, the mother revealed she stayed because she was scared and felt trapped. This story highlighted how powerful our thoughts can be; sometimes, fear holds us back more than reality does.
God has blessed us with life, the ability to think, and the free will to follow His principles. When pursuing our goals, we must remain flexible. It’s not just about achieving the goal on our timeline; it’s about trusting that if we work towards it, we will achieve it in God’s perfect timing. What we truly seek is often the feelings that accompany those goals—peace, abundance, and satisfaction.
Forgiving those who have hurt us is one of the most powerful things we can do. It frees us from emotional turmoil and allows us to move forward. Although forgiveness is hard, it is a command from God. Holding onto anger only gives those who hurt us the power to continue their torment through our bitterness.
There’s a saying: “Holding onto anger is like swallowing poison and wishing someone else would get sick.” In truth, we’re the ones harming ourselves. For years, I lived in a state of fight-or-flight, which took a toll on my health. However, practices like attending church, reading Scripture, and praying help refresh my mind and keep me on a godly path.
It’s easy to feel angry, but it’s just as simple to shift our perspective. One Sunday, I found myself frustrated over car troubles, but after church, I felt filled with gratitude. While we may not have everything, we have so much to be thankful for.
Forgiveness isn’t easy, but it’s essential for healing. Many cling to anger, which often obstructs their journey toward wholeness. We cannot move forward if we’re bitterly holding onto the past.
So, I ask you: What kind of life do you want? A life filled with freedom and joy, or one bound by bitterness? Most of us would choose joy, yet many unintentionally foster bitterness. If you desire a joyful life, you must live in a way that honours God. Internal work is necessary to truly experience joy, peace, and abundance.
Living outside of God’s principles will never serve you well. Forgiveness, faith, and following His way are the keys to a fulfilled and peaceful life.
I’d love to hear your thoughts! Have you ever struggled with forgiveness, and what steps have you taken toward healing? Please share your experiences in the comments below.
